moon mail: small ways of care

It's the New Moon and this is a new platform I'm testing out. It's been a while since I've written you a moon mail and I just want to say thank you for staying with me. It took me months to send something through this platform because self-doubt is real, but I decided in the future I want to send a separate monthly letter called sun drop: where I'll share things like my behind-the-scenes journey as a cross-border filmmaker, tools I use as an entrepreneur and projects I'm pitching, experimenting and playing with as an artist.

It's nearing the end of August and just as I thought the heat wave ended, this week it came back full force. This past month I've felt withdrawn, burnt out and just... sad. At the beginning of August, I had a histamine blowout that sent me to urgent care which was my signal to take better care of myself.

During this particularly low month, I committed to do small things to care for myself when I couldn't bring myself to do much else. Flossing everyday was enough. Setting a label on my alarm that said: "I'm grateful to wake up today" was enough. Some days just making my bed was enough. I stayed diligent about what I consumed, where I went, who I talked to and what I watched.

I reminded myself: this will pass as it always has.

My histamine levels have subsided to a more manageable place and I'm feeling a lot better mentally and physically. Staying mindful of my energy; who I give it to and what I direct it toward helps.

Since turning 40, I've felt a change within me, and although sometimes it feels more like an existential crisis, I recognize I am growing. I'm more in tune with my cycle. The inner work I've been doing is evident especially in the way I communicate with my husband and son. My boundaries are stronger, saying no to things and people that would cause more stress and less joy. I've become acutely aware of my triggers, reacting less. I'm choosing myself more.

The past few weeks, I didn't accomplish anything big or do anything out of the ordinary but showing myself one small gesture of love was more than enough.

Thank you for reading <3

For now, moon mail is free. If you want to stay updated, learn my journey as a filmmaker, business owner, non-profit founder and staying creative as a mother, consider donating as little as $5 to help support my writing and my film work through PayPal, Venmo or Stripe. You'll get one snail mail as a thank you.

See other ways I've cared for myself over the last few weeks in this YouTube short.